The Beauty of Behavior: Know More, Struggle Less

The Beauty of Behavior Know More, Struggle Less

Many of us have encountered these kinds of instruments before Myers Briggs (MBTI) social Styles, DISC, Colors, and more. There are numerous of these instruments on the market, and the majority of us have completed some kind of test in the years, perhaps in an academic course at college or even at work.

Our reaction to these tests typically sounds similar to “Yea, that’s pretty much like me,” and we then leave the test feeling that it was interesting to learn, however, “So what? What can I do using this information?”

As with all other aspects of life, when you are looking to improve in something, you must work at it. I love playing golf for amusement. I’ll never be an elite golfer because I lack the time (and perseverance) to become a professional. However, I like going out with my pals and playing a few times throughout the course of the year. I learn some tips from time to time and test them out. I’ve even taken an individual lesson every now and then.

Yes, I’m more proficient at golf than I was just a few years ago. But golf isn’t my favorite sport. I have a close friend who started playing golf when she was in her mid-fifties. She is extremely enthusiastic about the sport and puts lots of energy and time into it. And she is now a top golfer.

However, I am enthusiastic about behavioral patterns. They are my guide for dealing with people in every circumstance, including at the course!

Throughout my life, I’ve looked at various models of personality, behavior, and more. One thing I love is that the more I know, the more I am able to handle sales, relationships, situations, conflicts, and general communication.

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What if you could discover the way to discover the motives behind an individual? Discover their main goals or fears, as well as areas of blindness? What would that help you in dealing with them professionally and personally? Zig Ziglar (and other people) stated, “You can get anything you want in life if you just help enough other people get what they want”.

As a manager and leader, I have discovered that this is true. When I understand behavior, I am able to make a win-win situation in all kinds of situations. Are you thinking, “Isn’t that manipulation?” The most commonly used definition of manipulation is as follows: “To control or influence someone or something cleverly and unscrupulously, especially to one’s own advantage.”

If we’re practicing reading others and listening to the advice of Zig Ziglar, We do not manipulate. We’re helping other people get what they would like, which allows us to achieve the result we want. The most important thing is to be honest and ethical and wanting only the best for all parties that are involved. Doesn’t this what the concept of leadership and influence is about? Doesn’t that exactly what the best negotiators work for?

What I’ve observed is that the way that people behave is very predictable. Let me provide a review of one of the most popular models, which is that of the DISC model. It is used by more than 45 million users and is accessible in a variety of languages. The four quadrants of behavior:

Dominance

Characteristics: Rapid and quick to make decisions, and intense. Orientation.
Important Goal: Results and accomplishment.
Principal Fear: Being victimized or losing control.
Blind Spot: Not sensitive to the thoughts and feelings of other people.

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Influence

Characteristics: Rapid-paced, communicative, loves people and relationships.
Important Goal: Being competent in influencing others by being knowledgeable and looking nice.
The biggest fear is losing their influence and social rejection.
Blind Spot: Inefficient and lack of follow-through.

Steadiness

Characteristics: Slower pace team player, loyal and good listener. Kind and sensitive.
Principal Goal: Acceptance and appreciation, as well as stability.
Principal Fear: Loss of stability, abrupt changes.
Blind Spot: Making their needs first and being overly jealous.

Conscientiousness

Characteristics: Slower-paced and deliberate, methodical analytical, with high standards.
Key Goal: Accuracy, quality.
The biggest fear is criticism of their performance.
Blind Spot Aversion to self and others.
If I can master these essential concepts and begin to engage in reading for basic purposes, I can begin to observe how people behave and begin changing my approach to suit the demands of other people. When you begin asking yourself, “What do I see right now?” You can begin to unravel the pieces of the behavior puzzle. If you see anxiety in someone about an imminent change, it could be that they are exhibiting the signs of “Steadiness” or “S” behavior. Take a moment to figure out how you can be a better listener to the person’s concerns as well as slow down and show support and respect for their concerns. If they feel heard and valued, it will help them manage the stress and assist them in adjusting to the new situation. It’s really very simple.

The issue is that the majority of us remain locked in our preferred way of life, expecting others to behave the same way we do. This leads to conflict, confusion, and displeasure.

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The way we behave is fairly predictable. With a little experience and knowledge, we can learn to master behavior and obtain what we desire by helping others achieve what they desire. It’s a wonderful idea!

 

 

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